On the Mufs Treatment Bench... 2004

A new feature with more in-patients to be added in due course - indeed plenty of candidates amongst our bunch of crocks....(with apologies to Leonardo da Vinci for the shameful Vitruvian skiddies)

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Current Known Outpatients

Sicknote Nightbus Beast Dino di Claypole Sultan Foths Bicycle Towns Liberty The Master Ricky (ex)Daybus Bushmeister

Ian "Sicknote" Shiels

Patient Name: Sicknote
Ailments include:
Lower Back (rhs); Belly; Right Calf; Left Hamstring; Left Elbow; Right inside elbow; Left big toe. Now right knee (injured in bizarre fashion)
If he was a racehorse, he would be Araldite or UHU by now.
Status:Playing

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Tony "Nightbus" Simpson

Patient Name: Nightbus
Ailments include:
Groin (withered away); totty-scope (broken).
Status:Playing

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Richard "The Beast of" Sorrell

Patient Name: Beast
Ailments include:
Left ankle and calf; left hamstring(?).
Status:Playing

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Phil "Claypole" Rogers

Patient Name: Claypole
Ailments include:
Shoulder.
Status:Playing

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John Norman "Sultan" Baikie

Patient Name: Sultan
Ailments include:
Hamstring (right?); lower back. Now leg too in bizarre injury inflicted by a sightscreen
Status:Sidelined again... but hopefully no for long

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Rob Fotherington

Patient Name: Foths
Ailments include:
Broken thumb (r-h?)- just healed.
Status:Playing again

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Lindsay Towns

Patient Name: Bicycle Towns
Ailments include:
Right ankle (sprained).
Status:Playing

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Andy Knight

Patient Name: Liberty Knight
Ailments include:
Left hip (strained ligament) and abductor (strained). New ankle injury. Continual Brummie Whine (incurable)
Status:With more strappings than a bondage freak but playing again

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Siva Jayahanthan

Patient Name: The Masterful Jaya
Ailments include:
Lower back
Status:Playing - one would need to cut his legs off to stop this batting machine and even then...

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Iain Martin

Patient Name: "Ricky" Martin
Ailments include:
Hip, knees (carpet burns) and undisclosed injuries allegedly inflicted with hoover attachments.
Status:Playing when not off "hoovering"

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Andy Gray

Patient Name: ex-Daybus
Ailments include:
Broken hand - injured while fielding.
Status:Sidelined

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Clayton Burne

Patient Name: The Bushmeister
Ailments include:
Lower back
Status:Playing - but only just and at reduced pace

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